LelAki is UNpredictABLE!!!!!

Raya dah pun berlalu.. today is Raya yang ke 5.. Well..sad but true, even on hari raya itself there's no call from someone yang i really hope for..huhuhu.  I dont know.. maybe there's no more rindu.. or no more maaf.. Entahla..sedih memikirkannya.  What i'm waiting for?? Ignore it? Senang la u all cakap.."just forget about it"..hati ni sapa yang tahu. Aduh..sakitnya tuhan je yang tahu.. It's hari raya ok.. So sad... In 8 years..this is the first time i didnt received HARI RAYA CALLED from him.

Well...maybe it's true..there's no more hope for this relationship.. I've make my decision but not him...he didnt make any decision at all..he left all the things behind..dont want to take all the responsibilities.  He avoid to make the decision..OMG...i cant take this anymore.  I'm so damn weak..!!

But..is it semua guys pun sama macam ni... U tell the girls u care..but u never did anything to show them that u really care for them. I dont understand.. Kaum Adam ni is very Unpredictable... Do you think i should go on with another relationship...ohh..please help me.. I dont want to make the same mistake twice.  Even u know a guy who really good for u and he seem like sincere to u....but do you think he's the one for u?  Or he just same like ur former X.. I'm scared to take another risk.. It is not easy..giving commitment and flirting is two different things.. I can flirt...but right now i'm afraid to give commitment bcoz lelaki sekarang ni memang unpredictable.. susah nak jangka tindakan mereka.  Sometimes apa yang kita rasa tak sama dengan apa yang mereka rasa or fikirkan.  Adakalanya apa yang kita interpret tak sama dengan apa yang guys interpret... 

Entah la babe....perkara yang berlaku ada hikmah disebaliknya.  Itu adalah ujian dari ALLAH.. I mesti terima hakikat..redha dengan apa yang berlaku..

Notes:  Should i give myself a second chance??????

FeELing SaD n LoNELy!!!!

I'm feeling sad....for this past few months.???? Wonder why??? 

It's all about commitment..sakit hati if person yang u really love and care tak mau ada commitment dengan u.. What for?? What we called this relationship if there's no commitment.  U said "LOVE".."MISS"..."CANT LIVE WITHOUT U".."UR THE ONLY ONE".."U R DIFFERENT FROM THE OTHERS"...and banyak lagi sweet words yang confirm boleh buat hati dan perasaan cair.  Tapi apa tujuan sebenar relationship yang dibina bertahun-tahun lamanya..?? Pernahkah si dia terfikir akan janji-janji yang pernah ditabur sebelum ini.  Pengorbanan yang dibuat selama ini...totally sia-sia..  I called this KEJAM..  U cant just say "NO..not now my dear" to the one you really love.. That's what u said.. And u cant just say.."i ve a lot more things to settle then thinking bout COMMITMENT".....this is UNFAIR.. In this world, we cant wait for things to happen..we have to go for it.  Allah tidak akan mengubah nasib umat yang tidak mahu berusaha mengubah nasib mereka...

My dearie..

This is difficult for me.. I dont know what to do..to think..and dont even know what decision to make.. When i think about breaking up... It is like separating my soul from my body.  It hurts too much.. U said i need to wait more..be patient..and everything will be just fine.  But how much more?? How many years more do you need?  How many years more i ve to wait? Is it worth it for me waiting? Or u just saying nice sweet things so that i ll forget about it.

I still dont believe this is the end of a relationship.... Still cant believe it!!!